Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Finally here.
Would you stay with me.
I want to feel you.
I need to hear you.
You are the light.
That is leading me.
To the place , where I find peace.
Again.
You are strength.
That keeps me walking.
You are the hope.
That keeps me trusting.
You are life.
To my soul.
You are my purpose.
You're everything.
And how can I stand here with you.
And not be moved by you.
Won't you tell me.
How could it be , any better then this.
You calm the storms.
And you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands.
You won't let me fall.
You're still in my heart.
And you take my breathe away.
Would you take me in.
Take me deeper now.=went drinking yesterday. and yes i was farking high. i have got absolutely no idea how the hell i got to school today. my head's spining. still. gosh. what is the world coming to. tried to stay off hard liqour. but ... just like the person. the lure's too tempting. ha. and let's not forget it was bro's birthday. we went to cartel ... nice one. cause everyone was there and i was like damn happy to see all of them ??? missed them to bits. everyone is all blasted with home work and trust me ... its horrid. really. oh wells. i WISH MY BRO ALL THE BEST IN WHAT EVER SHE GETS DONE. we LOVE YOU !!!! :)CNY's just around the corner. and i can't wait to get my ANG PAOS. ha ha. imgine man. the amount of money used for alcohol and what nots. ha ha. :) and i'd be heading over to ling's place. ha ha. i miss my ah pui. scribble is MINE. ha ha.kaye\.-for i think i found something.-
memories locked at Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Monday, January 23, 2006
How is one to live a moral and compassionate existence when one is fully aware of the blood, the horror inherent in life, when one finds darkness not only in one's culture but within oneself? If there is a stage at which an individual life becomes truly adult, it must be when one grasps the irony in its unfolding and accepts responsibility for a life lived in the midst of such paradox. One must live in the middle of contradiction, because if all contradiction were eliminated at once life would collapse. There are simply no answers to some of the great pressing questions. You continue to live them out, making your life a worthy expression of leaning into the light.=okie. i just got to know something yesterday ... lost is a word you cannot discribe. of which you can only feel. ha ha. believe it or not i got it from a stupid movie !!! ha ha. and the person who wrote that on a particular wall ... wrote another 3 words. but scratched them off. cause it can only be felt. so say the author. and frankly ... i think so too. what say you ???ha ha. went out yesterday. and the many yesterday's before that. heh. haven't been updating. cause i fark hell not know what the hell to say. heh. anyways ... i am so into this wine place. its called wine connection. you can sit there , drink and be merry. ha ha. nonsense. ohh wells. i love the cheese platter there though. :) next week's THUMPER !!! nina kindly asked me to go ... and i think that i might be going. heh. cause like ... its my first time. i guess there is a first time for everything. considering ... its been a long time since i have been to a NEW club. ha ha. :) and this is going to be a lessie night ??? which makes it all the better. pts better be coming along. so yeah !!!tomorrow's bro's 19th birthday and as usual ... when it just hit me that i am 18 ... she is turning 19. ha ha. should be heading out and everything. heh. damn it. i hate feeling so young and yet OLD when i am with her. ha ha. the rest of the week is going to be used to celebrate the CNY !!! which of course i can't wait. cause i know i am going to enjoy the fark outta myself. heh heh heh. :) all the food is going to get me fat. i don't know if i can make it by july !!! argh !!!heh. whichever it is. i am still in it. and ain't afraid to state it. ha. i am such a farking fool. signing outt.kaye\.- you're a god and i am not.
memories locked at Monday, January 23, 2006
Monday, January 09, 2006
PROFILE name : geralyne kaye ong su teng.age : 18gender : femalelong term sickness (if any) : GID patient and asthma.number of family memebers : 4.siblings : 1 younger sister.LIKES food : italian ; japanese ; local ; hong kong cuisine.specific foods : beef ; kang kong ; salmon.favourite place to dine at : les amis ; pasta mania ; at home (my dad's cooking) ; crystal jadedrinks : coke ; evian.alcoholic drinks : teq sunrise ; CORONA ; magaritas.favourite place to drink at : eBalcony ; actually anywhere would do too.human characteristics : friendly ; out spoken ; frank ; crazy.colour : green and black.brand : HUGO BOSS ; ZARA ; Calvin Klein ; Springfield ; esprit would do too !!!!hobbies : i have this obsession with the changing of my friendster profile ; hanging out with my friends ; shopping with my mother - she's got the dough ; listening to music ; maybe KTV :) DISLIKES food : soggy vegetables and noodles.drink : distilled water & fizzy F&N. colour : pink.brand : GIODARNO & WhSmith.OTHERSname 3 things you did in the past hour : smsed babe ; watch tv ; ate dinner.name 3 things you hate about people : obssession with stupid things ; sheepish eyes ; bad attitude.name 3 things you love about school : my class mates ; free internet ; free entertainment.name 3 things you always do when you are free : eat ; go for supper ; hang out with my friends.name 4 things you need to get : top from topman ; a hair cut ; jeans and shoes.know what i am too tired to complete the rest of the blinking survey. ha ha.:)
memories locked at Monday, January 09, 2006
Sunday, January 08, 2006
how i wish.but ... its not so bad.patience does have its perks.i just need to be made sure that ...i got you.:)=i am like ... oh my god ??? ha ha. i feel like a gay bitch at the moment. oh my god. something has come over and taken over me. ha ha. farking nonsense. :) whichever it is ... i swear ... i feel so bitchy ... i feel like slapping and bitching right in front of ... any one's face. ha ha. this is so BAD !!! ARGH !!!gosh. today was pretty okie. did not puke. which was a good thing. heh. went to work ... even though i am SICK !!! cause no one else could work ... considering that they all have exams. ha ha. UNLIKE RP !!! :) worked till like evening ... then slacked around. and waited. ... and waited. and waiting. till JESSICA CAME !!! ha ha. she went to visit her uncle then .. kinda popped by. cause she woed me STRAWBERRY ICE CREAM !!! that's the best flavor. i swear ... you cannot find a better flavor other then strawberry. heh. - i like. so yeah !!! we went to mac's and get the strawberry sundae. ha. its the best thing on earth. even though i bought them in the end ... company when eating ice cream is VERY impotant. ha ha. friends are the best to eat them with !!! heh. :) i swear i looked like a kid in a candy shop. just imagine. its that ... INCREDIBLE. ha ha. then i cabbed down to my gram's ... while she went back to her uncle's place. heh. tomorrow's school and i have to go ... cause i promised thangkechi !!! ARGH !!! sucks man. sucks !!! whichever. i have to head to bed now. promised so many people i will sleep early. and i need to catch a real life TIGGER. *cries. later.kaye\.- so you sailed away ...
memories locked at Sunday, January 08, 2006
Saturday, January 07, 2006
i call it the riddler's revenge.he could never get things right on his own.he took it out on me.i failed to solve his love riddle.his revenges are sweet.they are what we call ...sad , gloom and heart ache.powerful mechanisims we all abhore.the riddler's revenge.heard of it ???=i am having and suffering from what i call 'tummy trouble' aka STOMACH FLU. oh my god. it has yet to leave me and my body alone. this stupid virus is worse then a farking ant irritating the very existence of my survival in this very urbanated world.wait.if you didn't understand that past sentence. ... you're NORMAL. and if you did. GOOD. ... now tell me what that means ??? ha ha. joking. *smiles.i am feeling horrid. i puked today. first time in my entire life did i have to puke out my food. cause my farking tummy can't take the pressure. damn it !!! *mumbles the deadly 7 hokkien words. heh. :) gosh. i don't know what to say. didn't attend school for like ... 2 days already. but i am still not feeling any better. my body wants to sleep. but my mind is like still so awake ... it scares the living day light outta me. god. i am going to head to the road bend now. later guys.kaye\. -then the world was smiling at me.-
memories locked at Saturday, January 07, 2006
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Sadness derives from hiding too much.
Its cause you've been hurt too much.
Its when your heart starts to awake.
I'd just take it as a black humored game you played with me.
There's no use hiding …
It just ever fails to find me.
I didn't want to expose you.
Even though I knew what was running through your head.
I'd just take it as a black humored game you played with me.
=
Okie. Let's get some things straight. I am still the 'Ang Moh Kan Tang' that I have always been. Ha ha. Just that now I am one with a farking twist. :) You can't blame me … I can sing Chinese songs , but I need like a gallion replays to understand the meaning of the song. Ha ha. Like … Major difference eh ??? Ha ha.
So addicted to my Chinese selection on my MP3. Heh. Stayed home the whole day … after going to the stupid doctors that is. I so hate the doctor that I went to see today. FARKING IRRITATING. Oh my god. He kept poking or rather pressing on my tummy. Which made me feel even worse. BECAUSE … Okie … I know I don't have a very nice and flat and six packed TUMMY !!!
Haha. And he just kept on poking. OH MY GOD. If I had a hammer it would have flown right on his face !!! :) And I mean it with every bit of madness I have inside of my body as at … NOW. My fever's up to a WHOOPING 39.6 just now. Beat that !!!
Maybe it'd help burn off some memories. How I wish. Whichever it was … I have been sleeping. Eating very bland food and CONSTANTLY feel like puking my GUTS out every time I finish eating anything. How nice.
Now why do I feel like a bitch. Enough with the bitching. Heh. Jessica's back from the states and she said she'd visit later. Let's hope she means it !!! I need some entertainment. So sick my brain's like running on Windows 95. *faints.
Let's just end the bitching.
Outta ere.
Kaye\.
-it’s a smile …
No matter how … Antediluvian.
I'd always treasure it.-
memories locked at Thursday, January 05, 2006
Monday, January 02, 2006
its day one. back to basics.the haunting has bearly started.and i am at your plead.i can't think of any other way.the only way for me is down - free fall.i need a cusion for my fall.but no one can hear my scream.= like oh my god. today's day one of school and i can almost just die. i couldn't even like wake up this morning ... and now i am having visual basics. HOW NICE. oh my god. someone just kiss my arse to humour me. PLEASE. my class is back to its hay days. and i so ... can't wait. they are so funny i find it hard to fark them up. ha ha. KTV ANYONE ???i miss jessica. - she makes the best grinder aka botty shaker. and yes. she's got me trippin' ... spending all your money on me. [i was so forced to write that in. i SWEAR.] she better be coming back to singapore soon !!! god. i miss so many people can !!! i miss babe. i miss bro. i miss ling. oh my god. ... someone help. kaye\.-suffering under the wrafs of humanity.-
memories locked at Monday, January 02, 2006
thinking about thoughts,that should have crossed my mind a thousand times before. a facade i can only re create with the images of you, that are somehow locked in the memories of my yesterdays. i can't find the reasons to why it still hurts me so.lost in the mirages of maybes and could nots. i still can't get up on my feet and face the world.cause all i can look forward to,all i can think ahout ...is when can i ever hold you back in my arms again.that's all i ever think of.you've become my sub concious reliance ...that i can't give up.=like oh my god. its like so freaking long since i typred here. god damn it. gosh. i am not sure what is really going on for the moment. but i know one thing ... relationships with girls are definately no more for me. at least for now. i ain't interested in anyone , cept for one. so yeah. gosh. been clubbing ... rather drinking like a fish. and its like no one's business. i can only smile and watch it all go by. not that i am complaining that i am not happy with it. ... but , yeah. this is going to be so new for me ... i am scaring myself out of my own underwear. beat that. heh. tomorrow's school starting. and i have yet to figure out how in the world i am going to get to school. i have been sleeping so late ... i have been waking up at the wee hours of the morning just to write. cause some how ... inspiration finds me at that particular timing. nice one eh ???oh well. school is tomorrow. and i can feel the lost in me coming out again. heh. this is my cynical mind telling myself i will be okie. -kaye/. drowning in the solitude i carved out.
memories locked at Monday, January 02, 2006