Wednesday, June 14, 2006
i don't know whether i should be happy or not at all.
i got into the navy. i have to go back on the
28th of june and on the 29th of july for the second interview and the contract signing , as follows. but then the thing is that , i am having
butterflies in my tummy. which is making me go nuts. i don't know whether i should or not.
it
seems promising. and i swear there was this super
wierd moment during the interview. cause it was conducted with 3 other people. it was damn wierd la. so the very queer moment happened like that :
officer : so , can i say that you like to dress more to the masculine side ???
me : yes. you could.
officer : would it be a problem if you were to train with girls ???
me : why should there be.
okie. it was totally wierd. and
definately uncalled for. cause like ,
HELLO !!! how the fuck do you ask this kinda question man. oh my fucking god. whichever. he can
rot in hell.
went to work yesterday feeling super tired. cause the night before that i went for a majong session and only slept at like 5am in the
fucking morning. not that i am complaining or anything. but i had to wake up at 0830 hrs just for the farking interview.
you do the math.
i think i have an
o'malley. not the normal kinda o'malley. more of the , you do things with but yet again you don't. that kinda thing. i am in a stupid positon which i put myself into. it goes like this , she is someone.
pretty important in your life. whether you like her on the surface or not. you do like her inside.
admist the facade and everything you put on.
secondly , if she comes back to you like bees to honey ; than what. no.
there was no sextual activity involved. but its like when you see her , there is this
insatiable desire to hug her. not the kinda friendly hug. but the kinda hug that can make
everything else around you go slient ; and that's really all i need.is there an
'us' now. i don't know. this is one
hell of a roller coaster ride i tell you. i met o'malley yesterday with her friend. we kinda hanged out. went to marina square finally saw
ahtoh aka qingaide.
missed her to bits.
then after
much consideration i went back to her place.
for football of course. it sucks staying home watching it alone. when there is no one to accompany you. so yesh. i went for a stay over.
the rest is to be in my private blog.
its wierd. i know. but yet again. this is me. so me.
i hate myself. counsellour asked if i knew what i was doing. i told her. i
some how do. and yet i don't. which is really what is going on at this moment in time.
o'malley and i talked about it last night. its not that we are not single.
we definately are. but then the thing is ... what is going on here !!!???
oh my fucking god.
i don't want to have any strings attached. it works better. yesh ???
i am so in shit.
so what are we considered eh. wait ... is there a
'we' to being with ??? then again , i was thinking. what am i really thinking. this is getting way out of hand and complicated. i think o'malley and i need to talk.
big time.kaaye\.- i didn't think i love you enough.
maybe that explains this.
memories locked at Wednesday, June 14, 2006
