never saw it coming.
i should have started running.

Thursday, July 13, 2006
you don't know how scary it is. to be in this position , where by every single step that you take is being taken into the highest consideration. and then not to forget ... you love her so much. and sometimes it seems that she likes you back , but yet again on the other hand ... it feels like she is just making use of you.

you think of the more positive side of things. telling yourself that 'no , she is really in for it this time'. but your head tells you other wise. she says , 'i can't push you away cause i still feel something for you'. then what do you make of that. my head's in a swirl. and i am bloody tired , tryingto fight against this bloody incubus.

her every want your doing. do you know how it feels ??? her talking about guys in front of you. and all you can do is ... pretend. pretending that you never knew anything at all to begin with. how so. do you know how difficult it is ??? to even start the whole thing off ???

i see myself fade away. i have got no idea how many times i have said that ... but i really do see myself do it. its like i am disappearing within myself from each passing day. you won't know how it feels , how bad it makes you feel. how stressful it is.

when that bloody itchy fetchy feeling comes to you. when it hits you right hard in the face. that you actually miss her more then she misses you. that your misses come with all the sincerity that your heart can give. but for hers .. everything is but doubtful. then you wonder ... what have you gotten yourself into.

cause i gotten myself into shit ... that is irreversible.
its that bad.


kaaye\.


- do you know how much i miss you.
how much i love you.
with all my heart has to give.
and yet ...
i have got no idea what you are thinking.

all about me;
kaaye\. 19years.
22nd november 1987.
overgrown kid.
taken.
my sanity's long gone.



likes\.
hanging out with my friends ; ALOT.
nice tasting alcohol in general ; erdinger ; mojito ; moet or blessed vc.
trance ; house ; rock ; alternative ; punk ; metal ; bossa nova / jazz.
new gadgets.
baking ; cupcakes and all.
shiny stuff.
the sun , the sand , the water = THE BEACH !!!
slacking like there is no such thing as time.



dislikes\.
the people i hate are all irritating !!!
horrid people ; with appalling characters.
people with horrid manners.
insects and such.
bad weather.
headaches ; ankle sprains.
BAD COFFEE !!!
greens.



wish list\.
that calculator casio watch.
that pair of rock and republic pants.
that perfect messenger bag.
that new PDA !!!
that new laptop.
that pair of adidas shoe-wees.
that pair of tiger shoe-wees.
that new jacket.
that nike haversack.
that new tops from pull and bear.
that new pair of jeans.
that flesh imp top.
that head porter bag.
that pair of lacoste shoe-wees.

shoutouts.

plugs.


credits.
blogskins greene_sprit host

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